The Daily Star, Oneonta, NY - otsego county news, delaware county news, oneonta news, oneonta sports


October 9, 2008

From The Publisher's Desk: Children's needs must come first

A child's unconditional love is a precious gift, and I thank the stars above every day for my daughter, Hailey.

I am fortunate to have a support system that runs deep. There is my husband, and our families and friends who will undoubtedly influence me as a parent and help determine the woman my daughter will become.

Juggling a 2-year-old and a career is difficult as obligations tug me in different directions a lot of the time. I cannot imagine going it alone, yet many do.

Solid relationships will be tested with the added financial burdens that will ensue as our country deals with rebuilding fiscal stability.

It is even more difficult to find a middle ground to raise a child outside a committed relationship. Communication, consistency and compromise are vital in the upbringing of a child. Establishing boundaries is essential for children and _ more importantly _ between two parents who will be forever tied but have gone along separate paths in life.

Inevitably, parents do not see eye-to-eye on everything, but by talking though their positions, solutions can be attained.

For example, my husband was given his first car while I had to earn every dime to pay for mine. Boy, I loved that little Volkswagen Fox!

Anyway, based on our experience, Kevin suggests that we purchase Hailey's first car, and I am a firm believer that she will appreciate and respect it more if it's purchased with her own money.

We have reached a compromise that both of us can live with. Peanut Bug (I will save this column for you), just be prepared, you will need to work for your first car, and the amount you put in, we will match.

Sadly though, as relationships end, parents often forget the art of negotiation. One male friend is in the process of a bitter divorce. He desperately wants time with his son and has made personal and financial sacrifices to fight for his parental rights.

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