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Columns

May 20, 2008

Travels with Uncle Chet: VP spot is next big question

``Do the Republicans really want to win this year?'' asked Uncle Chet as he poured glasses of red wine to go with bacon-and-tomato pizza.

``They always want to win,'' I said.

``And preside over the biggest defeat in our history?'' he asked, ``the trillion-dollar loss of Iran and Afghanistan? Do they want to be held responsible for gas going up a dime a week and angry people losing their homes, their hopes, everything?''

``It may not be that dire,'' said Alice as she passed the fruit salad around the table. ``How many people do we know who are losing a home?''

``Or would they rather hand this one off to the Democrats,'' he said, ``the failed war and an economy so weak they have to send out refunds a year early and beg us to spend like there's no tomorrow?''

``Now there's a cheery thought,'' said Hon.

``You know your money is becoming worthless when the government sends it back to you,'' said Uncle Chet. ``And you know the Republicans can't be serious when they put up a retro-candidate like McCain. He makes Dole look like a fresh face.''

``He's about even in the polls, last I saw,'' I said.

``Florida's the only state where he has a chance,'' he said. ``He'll go down two-to-one in November when the Democrats rally round Obama, and that's already starting. By Wednesday, Hillary will be out of contention and the big question will be, `who should be the veep?''

``What's a veep?'' asked Buddy, who was following this closely.

``Right now, he's a creep,'' said his older sister, our ninth-grader, and everyone eyed her.

``Very good!'' Uncle Chet beamed.

```Veep' is short for vice president,'' said Hon. ``Uncle Chet is wondering who'll run with Obama to be vice president.''

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