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Columns

October 21, 2008

Travels with Uncle Chet: GOPers throwing the election

COLUMBUS _ ``What's it going to be?'' asked Hon, who was setting the table. ``Obama in a squeaker or a landslide?''

``I'll take it either way,'' said Uncle Chet from the rattan rocker near the wood stove. ``As long as we don't elect Elmer Fudd.''

``Elmer Fudd?'' said second-grader Buddy, who sat on the rug with our Springer Spaniel. ``He's on YouTube with Bugs Bunny!''

``I know, and he was at the debates, too, shooting blanks at that wascally wabbit,'' said Uncle Chet. ``And Fudd was so testy, so confused, it made me wonder whether the Republicans are deliberately tanking this time.''

``Don't want to win, because Bush is leaving such a mess?'' I said from over where I was installing an interior storm window.

``Sure,'' Chet said as he sipped wine and soaked up the heat coming from the fire. ``Six months after Obama's in, it's going to be his recession, his health care crisis, his three wars, and Fox News will be screaming for his head.''

``Three wars?'' asked Hon.

``Iraq, Afghanistan, and remember that old standby, the war on terror?'' he said. ``Obama's going to inherit three failed wars and a sick economy. People are going to lose homes, jobs, retirements. They want a quick fix, but Fort Knox is empty and we can't spend our way back to prosperity. Millions of jobs have been sent to China and it's going to take years to rebuild our economy. The neocons know this; they're the ones who cleaned us out, so now they're throwing the election, pretending to be upset while they gear up for next time.''

``Well, I think McCain wants it, even if those around him believe it's a lost cause,'' said Hon, removing corn bread from the oven.

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