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Columns

November 3, 2012

I'm worrying about what's to become of me after Nov. 6

(Continued)

The Iowa Caucus began for the Republicans on Jan. 3, followed a week later by the New Hampshire primary. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
When the Yankees’ pitchers and catchers reported to Spring Training on Feb. 19, I kissed my wife on the forehead and told her to take good care of herself, that I would see her after the World Series in October and would be glad to give her a ride to the polls Nov. 6.
I wasn’t leaving town. I was just going upstairs to spend rapturous hours watching the Yanks on television while scrutinizing every political website I could find for clues about which Republican was going to run against President Barack Obama, and then, who was going to win the election.
The previous two paragraphs are only a slight exaggeration. I went to work, ate a meal or two with my spouse and even remembered her birthday, but life basically boiled down to the pennant and presidential races.
Sadly, the Yankees — who mysteriously forgot the purpose of the wooden implements they carried to the plate — were eliminated in the playoffs in October by the Detroit Tigers.
And in just a few days, the election — for good or bad — will be over … and my life shall be barren.
But I can’t think about that now. The huddled masses, don’t you know, seek my insight, and who am I to disappoint them to the point that they unhuddle?
So, here you go.
I get a warm feeling when I remember all those — real and imagined — Republican candidates for president rising and plummeting in the polls while the party desperately sought somebody … anybody … other than Mitt Romney to run against Obama.
I wasn’t the first one to note that Michele Bachmann, Ron Paul, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Herman Cain and Donald Trump all seemed to have emerged from the same clown car.

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