Dear Chad,
I have been with the most wonderful girl on the face of the planet for our entire high school career. Yet, as we are rounding the corner to our senior year, we are both talking about what we are going to do after high school, and it kills me to say this, but it seems the road we have been journeying on is getting ready to branch off.
I have gone over so many scenarios in my head, and the thought of us splitting after all that we have been through brings nothing but darkness in my life. I feel completely lost without her, yet I can't ask her to give up what she wants to do to be with me. What should I do?
Thanks,
Alone in the Dark
Dear Alone in the Dark,
Your question is something I'm sure most teens think about, and yet it is the hardest thing to answer. The truth is I really don't know how to. As a teenager, myself, I want to tell you to give your relationship all that you have and fight to stay together because that is what I think true love means, but most adults would say "goodbyes" are a part of life, and that high school relationships rarely last.
So this is the best advice I can give you: Try to come to some plan that will allow you to both do what you want.
If this isn't possible, then I say each take your own path, but after the hard goodbyes and the long walk that you take, I want you to hold on to your feelings as best as you can.
If you both truly believe it is meant to be, then it is, and don't let any adult tell you otherwise.
It's your life, and in the end it will be the way you made it. I really hope I have helped.
Best of wishes,
Chad
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Dear Chad,
I'm a junior in high school, and a pretty easy guy to get along with ,I hear, but I'm not good with confronting people with certain topics such as this, so please help the best you can.
There is a girl in my English class who smells really bad.
I sit next to her and the odor is really starting to come into conflict with my ability to work and to pay attention in class. The fact that she is a female is making this harder to bring up to her, as I don't want to offend her in any way. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
I really think your problem is a lot less difficult than you are making it out to be, but I understand how confrontation could be intimidating in these circumstances. You have to understand that you may not be the only person that is being bothered by this person's odor, but on the other hand you have to understand that it may not be the person's fault she smells the way she does. The girl in your English class may live with many animals, such as on a farm, and the odor from the animals could get into her clothes, thus creating the odor. I would be very direct about how you tell her: tell her you don't want to offend her, and then address the issue. If you feel like uncomfortable doing this being a guy, ask one of your female friends if they could do it for you (or you can always ask a teacher).
You sound like a very mature person not wanting to offend her with this, so you may want to bring it up in some way to her before someone else does in a more hurtful manner.
Hope I have helped.
Good luck,
Chad
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Dear Chad,
I have this friend in school who I have been friends with for many years now. His sister is our age and although I didn't mean to, I started to get feelings for her. We have a lot in common and I am very happy when I am around her. You must obviously see the issue I'm having; being best friends with her brother makes this more difficult than usual. If you can, please help me.
Thanks,
The Friend
Dear The Friend,
I would talk to your friend about it. If you just ask his sister out and she says "yes," he may feel like you stabbed him in the back for not talking to him about it. I'm sure if you talk to him and let him know how you feel he may be more likely to give you his blessing on the matter. Keep in mind you may be entering a very odd relationship: as if you and her start dating and then an argument begins to emerge later on, your friend would be stuck in the middle of choosing between his best friend and his sister.
Still I would not let that change your decision. You will never know the future until you get there, and things may possibly be easier having your girlfriend be the sister of your best friend "" you never know.
Good luck,
Chad
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Chad Shipman is a junior at Unadilla Valley High School. You can send your questions to Chad by e-mail at chad’shipman21@yahoo.com, or by mail to Check with Chad, c/o The Daily Star, P.O. Box 250, Oneonta, NY 13820.
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