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April 5, 2014

As Time Goes By: There's lint in my belly button, and other observations


Remember the “ding” sound? This does not signal the completion of a dryer cycle, as once suspected, but that instant when a trap door on the dryer drum opens and receives one sock as tribute to the robot dynasty yet to come.

Now I know that you are all excited about telling me the function of a lint trap. The lint trap is an extension of the robot dynasty and on command the lint trap stops collecting lint so that the discharge air goes from “safe for a baby to breathe” too, one whiff and you will know where the sock lint has been.

One might get the impression that dryer lint is thus contained but this is far from the truth. The lint trap will slowly allow some lint to “seep” out and blend into the atmosphere.

At this point enter the “navel.” As a small child I was fascinated by my navel and being scientifically oriented made the following observation. The belly button is not a straight pipe to the stomach. It does not accept milk or cereal or fried liver. Try as I would I could never get rid of the liver — cereal like Cheerios just lay there until they could be “picked off” at my leisure. The belly button in all its glory was a sucker for sock and clothing lint that “seeped” from the dryer.

Belly button lint from my early observations did not have any definitive taste; it all depended on what you could add to it to take away the bland taste. Looking under your highchair tray was a good place to start. You could always find some dried on jelly, cereal and on some occasions dried liver.

On another note, has anyone else noticed that commercials have gotten more air time than the shows?

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