Mother's Day is traditionally the busiest day of the year for calling home to mom.
But for mothers with sons or daughters in Iraq or Afghanistan, phone calls this Sunday are no guarantee.
"The reality is, they call when they can," said Helen Van Houten of Davenport, whose son, Sgt. Michael Van Houten, is on his third tour with the Army in Iraq.
The last time she heard from her son was three weeks ago, when he telephoned home.
"That's not unusual," she said this week.
There are 159,000 U.S. troops serving in Iraq, 31,000 deployed to Afghanistan and nearly 200,000 others stationed elsewhere overseas, according to the Pentagon.
For the mothers of these airmen, marines, sailors and soldiers, every day their son or daughter calls home is Mother's Day.
Van Houten, 23, deployed to Iraq for the first time in 2003, his mother said.
This was followed by a second tour beginning in 2005. He shipped out to Iraq for a third time last July. On this occasion, his tour is for 15 months, Helen Van Houten said.
He is her only child.
"It doesn't matter if you have one child or six children. When one of them is in a war zone, it is difficult," Van Houten said.
Although today's generation of troops is more closely connected to their families back home through e-mail and cell and satellite phones, there is still the uncertainty of war, long workdays and time zone differences.
Spc. Anthony Capristo, 25, is a former Oneonta call firefighter who deployed to Iraq in December after joining the Army in 2006. It is his first tour of duty in Iraq.
All his mother, Dale Capristo, knows is that he is in a remote part of the country. She said she does not know his exact location.
"He won't tell me that," Capristo said.
Capristo said she receives e-mails from her son "almost weekly."
When she received her first phone call from him recently, it was more comforting than an e-mail.
"He sounded good," Capristo said. "It's nice to hear their voice."
The soldiers are serving in separate military police units, and both their mothers work at the State University College at Oneonta.
"My father, brother and husband are all veterans," Helen Van Houten said. "It's just what he decided he wanted to do."
The first deployment in 2003-04 was "nerve-wracking," Van Houten said. "Now I know what to expect."
Anthony Capristo's older brother lives in Germany and works in the private sector. His younger sister is in college.
"We're not a military family," Dale Capristo said.
Because her other son is living overseas, Capristo said she has "kind of" gotten use to separation from her children.
Capristo said she may not think about her soldier-son every minute, but she certainly thinks about him every day.
Christmas was a little harder to bear than what she thinks Mother's Day will be like, Capristo said.
Both women send care packages to their sons.
For Sgt. Van Houten, these bundles from home consist mostly of snacks, books, video games and fantasy miniature figurines.
Painting the figurines is her son's hobby, Van Houten said, and it has a calming effect on him.
For Spc. Capristo, the packages are mostly food, his mother said.
Tuna fish in pouches, mixed nuts, Hormel microwaveable dinners, gum and popcorn are his major requests, Capristo said.
Both women said they didn't know if they would hear from their sons this Mother's Day.
Van Houten said a soldier's ability to contact home varies a lot in Iraq.
"It depends on the base that you are at, and it depends on the job that you are doing," Van Houten said.
Some bases have ready access to the Internet and phone service, while others don't.
"I hope I get to hear from him, but I'm fairly certain I won't," Van Houten said.
Capristo is a bit more hopeful: "I wouldn't be surprised."
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