Eventually, he just stopped asking.
Goal No. 5: Work out what the Boy is talking about when he is talking about video games.
My electronic game knowledge maxed out at Donkey Kong. While I had a brief period in the mid-1990s where I was addicted to Myst, my skillz are far from mad, as the kids would say.
The Boy, however, is an obsessive about Mario and Minecraft. He loves to tell me all about the neat new thing the developers have added. Mom! he’ll holler. The new MarioKart has a frazzjabbler that can whizzwang! But it’s only on the DSPSi 4000! Can we get a DSPSi 4000?
My standard answer is “no,” mostly because a DSPSi sounds expensive. Still, it would be nice to know what one is.
Goal No. 6: Require both kids to maintain a path from their bedroom doors to their actual beds.
I can let personal hygiene slide in the summer, especially when they are in and out of various pools all day long. But I do need to be able to walk from the door to their beds, if only to turn out the light left on when they crashed into sleep. Stepping on various books, half-opened nail polish containers and the aforementioned pine cones is about as much fun in the summer as it is in the winter. Less so, actually, because my feet are bare.
Goal No. 7: Resolve to put all flip-flops in the shoe bin by the back door. Or, failing that, resolve to let the kids live with the consequences.
Lucy the dog can’t resist anything that smells like feet, which is simply more proof that dogs are disgusting. Cute and lovable, yes, but icky.
She loves to carry around, then destroy, any object of footwear, from socks to snow boots. Her favorite, however, is the lowly flip-flop, because they are light and fun to chew. Part of my summer routine is to fling any kid flip-flops I find into the cardboard box we keep by the door, simply because I don’t want to deal with buying new ones — and my yelling “SHOES” does about as much good as yelling “DOOR.”