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October 19, 2013

As Time Goes By: Scruples in short supply among lawmakers


If you are in a position of public trust and use a lame excuse to “fill an urge to walk the Appalachian Trail” while visiting your mistress in South America and then get re-elected, you have no scruples

If you are in a position in the medical world to pad bills because it has become a way of life, you may have no scruples.

If you are a politician and you want to acquire some scruples so you could be re-elected based on deeds rather than empty words, there is hope for you.

Using my electronic marvel, I “Googled” “Scruples how to get them,” and got a reference to the CCBSCOS, or Close Cover before Striking College of Scruples.

SCRUPLES College has a whole series of courses from beginners to more advanced courses at a graduate level.

I went to visit the president of SCRUPLES and discovered that he had his beginning at FOOLUM University. He stated that SCRUPLES had many more applications than they had room for in the courses because it is well recognized that few politicians have scruples today and that unemployed people are eager to get on the politician gravy train.

He showed me the beginning course, Scruples 101, where each participant discovers his own conscience, or since so many are lacking one, he can buy a conscience by ordering a cricket cage made in China and also a genuine cricket named “Jiminy,” also made in China. (A visit from the “Blue Fairy” is $500 extra.)

There is a Liberal Arts requirement in English 200 titled “Shouting.” Recognizing that the “Squeaky wheel gets the oil,” the course in shouting is self-explanatory. Whether innocent or guilty, the student must shout down his or her accusers and in so doing make the point that “might is always right.”

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