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Tom Grace

May 19, 2009

Travels with Uncle Chet: GOP is hurting

COLUMBUS _ ``You know what's killing the Republican Party?'' asked Uncle Chet, looking at his raised glass of wine as if the answer was there.

``Rush Limbaugh, voice of the GOP,'' said Hon. ``He's their symbol now, and he's no Lincoln.''

``He's not even a Falcon,'' said Uncle Chet.

``He's not even an Edsel,'' I said.

``Isn't that a car?'' asked the little miscreant, our 15-year-old who was munching on multigrained chips and salsa.

``Which one?'' I asked

``They all were,'' Hon told her, while pouring Buddy some orange juice.

``I think torture is going to kill the Republicans,'' said Alice, who sat nearest the stove, where a fire kindled on this cool night in May. ``I mean, when you think of torture, which names come to mind?''

``Cheney,'' I said.

``Bush,'' said Hon. ``He had to have known.''

``And Rove,'' said Uncle Chet. ``Because wasn't he the spider, spinning the web?''

``All Republicans,'' said Alice, ``although last week, they were trying to implicate Pelosi because they know how dangerous that image is.''

``It's death among women,'' said Hon. ``Mothers of soldiers, mothers of peaceniks, no one wants torture. I think we're going to see a wider and wider gender gap.''

``Fact is, we're all in this together,'' said Uncle Chet. ``The last administration smeared the American name, and millions around the globe hate you and me as much as they hate any right-winger. No one whose brother was shocked, beaten and waterboarded is going to say, `Oh, of course there are some very nice Americans, too.'''

``That's what I mean,'' said Alice. ``What they did, what they allowed, is a crime on many levels and if we get trials, most of the defendants will be Republican. I think it could be their final act before they go the way of the Whigs.''

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